When I resigned my church ministry position on 10/10/10, I was hurt. I was depleted. I was empty. I needed time to recover. My well – being was at jeopardy. My health had suffered to the point of my blood pressure being 200/110 as a pastor. I loved the Lord and my family, but I didn’t need to jeopardize my health anymore. It was as if the oxygen was sucked out of my lungs. It hurt to breathe. I just couldn’t catch my breath. I have read quite a bit about those who have climbed Mount Everest and the struggle they experienced when climbing above 26,300ft/8,000m. Without climbing Everest or any mountain that high, it felt as if I was trying to survive in the death zone mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
What the “spiritual death zone” represented in my life was the place in my call to ministry where I didn’t care about anyone or anything. It was as if I had trouble breathing. It felt like I was going to die. Mentally, I wanted to give up. Emotionally, I lost the desire to live. Spiritually, I found no hope; it was gone. I just couldn’t find it. I felt like I was going to die. I had faith in the Lord and knew I was loved, but my hope is gone. Soon I found myself admitted to a Veteran’s hospital for help. It was at that time that He found me.
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